Trying to understand God
I personally do not find it easy to understand God’s ways–especially, when life is hard and seems unfair. Reading in Job this week has helped as has reading in Psalm 62. I did not receive much comfort from reading Psalm 128 last week–fear God and walk in his ways and you will be blessed. Too simple and not in touch with the pain of life. I know as a general principle Psalm 128 is true–it is not a promise to be claimed. But I honestly struggled to read it last week, preferring to read Job and the end of Hebrews 11 and about the faithful saints who lived by faith and yet did not receive the promise . . . in this life anyway.
Psalm 62:11-12a says, Power belongs to God, and that to you, O Lord, belongs steadfast love. This comes out from a man who is being attacked, being lied about, slandered, and possibly being the object of extortion and robbery. And what God whispers to him in the silence, I am powerful, I am in control. And I care–I love you with a faithful, steadfast love.
Reminds me of the words of our friend Lynn who spoke at her husbands memorial service. Her husband Russ died after suffering more than ten years from a degenerative brain disorder–being bed-ridden for most of the last three. Lynn cared for Russ at home, with the help of full-time care givers. Her courage and strength were God’s courage and strength displayed in her.
Here is a portion of what Lynn shared (quoted with her permission),
As Russ grappled with the knowledge and acceptance of a brain disease that would slowly take away his cognitive ability his eyesight, his creativity, his memory –he responded to the question – “Why me?” with “Why not me?”
Russ said – i volunteered to be in the service of the king. Who am i to question his orders or his wishes. Why not me, Lord? I serve in all circumstance, not only when they are pleasant or comfortable. I serve even when i do not understand your orders. I am willing to go through this disease – help me to do so to you glory.”
That has been Russ’ prayer over the past years. Rarely did he understand the ‘why’ of the disease, or in particular the timing of the disease.
Lynn said that one truth that kept she and Russ going was that God is sovereign, God is good and God loves us. Here are Lynn’s words from the memorial service.
But God is sovereign. God is good. His sovereignty and His goodness do not depend on our agreement, our advice, or even our understanding.
I do not understand many things about God but this is truth worth holding onto: God is sovereign, God is good and God loves us.