Home > Ramblings > Member Care and Counseling: Days 3 and 4

Member Care and Counseling: Days 3 and 4

October 14, 2009 Leave a comment Go to comments

Attending this conference with about 50 other missionary types, all of us involved to some degree in missionary member care along with staff and friends from the Narramore Foundation.  Thanks Bruce for making this happen.  A few key points from days 3 and 4

Jenny Pak gave a powerful testimony on generational transference at the cultural level

  1. She talked about her journey of being a female in a male world of being a minority in a white world (she is a 1.5 Korean American). Her book: Korean American Women: Stories of Acculturation and Changing Selves (Studies in Asian Americans : Reconceptualizing Culture, History, Politics) by Jenny Hyun Pak
  2. Her model of sanctification is one in which Christ brings a greater fullness of the self rather than the pressure of a gradual erasure of the self which she felt from her cultural background
  3. Quoting John 15 and “Apart from me you can do nothing”, she said sanctification is all about utter dependence!

Bruce Narramore challenged us in a lecture about the emotional life of Jesus

  1. He noted that the most frequent emotion of Jesus was compassion which should free us since, “our capacity to love may be limited but we are able to have compassion to those we don’t know.”
  2. To become more like Christ means experiencing emotions like Jesus.
  3. Grief and mourning are two of the most ignored or avoided emotions by Christians. We may try to fix things for people because we are uncomfortable with their pain. Remember, Jesus was the “Man of Sorrows.”
  4. Emotional healthy people have a range of emotions, a flexible emotional life, are in touch with their emotions and don’t get stuck in certain emotions
  5. You don’t get closer to God by avoiding a specific sin.
  6. We have a tendency to depend on grace for salvation but on law for sanctification,

John and Becky Leverington gave a sobering message on child protection

10.  “The test of the morality of a society is what it does for its children.” Bonhoeffer

11.  Children’s safety is everyone’s responsibility

12.  We can decrease risk of child abuse by avoiding isolation, ensuring accountability and balancing power and control.

13.  Jenny Pak led us through a fun exercise in which we pictorialized our emotions using a cut and paste exercise using the following colors: Red for angry; yellow for happy; blue for sad; green for shame; white for fear.  Revealing!

Bruce Narramore provided some solid teaching on basic counseling skills

14.  In supportive counseling we are trying to reduce symptoms not deal with causes.  He gave us a number of practical ways to do this since this is the type of care that most of us will be giving.

15.  Re-educative counseling is designed to promote an increased insight and understanding; change patterns of thinking and feeling.  A key tool to be used here is mirroring—to help people feel connected without using words or giving advice.  A quote he gave us from? “I just hope my patients hear beneath my words.”

16.  It is better to be quiet and though a fool rather than speak up and confirm all doubt

17.  Some images to help with skills: safe professional friend; window-opener; fig leaves; Hound of Heaven; emotional waste basket

More from Jenny Pak on East vs West

18.  Biculturalism is like being in a no-mans land—two values that are clashing all the time.

19.  We are motivated in the west by whatever gets me going–my passions, my internal needs and feelings and so we are likely to be vocal about what we want to do. In contrast, in the  east, they are taught to be restrained and to focus on what the family or organization needs; to make decisions on what will bring security for family.

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