Home > Ramblings > A lesson yet to be learned?

A lesson yet to be learned?

It has been almost a week since I have written any posts–I wish it was because I have been on vacation–NOT!  Last week I attended the first week (out of four) in our member development program.  The focus was on the Inner Life of the Leader.  It was a good week but did involve some deep reflecting which I do not always find easy–ok, I never find easy!!!  There were around 19 attendees with four presenters and for the most part, the approach used is one of dialogue education.  At the end of the week, we all presented our “timelines.”  I had done this back in 1996 but a lot has happened since then and so I managed to update my timeline until the present.  After I presented on Friday morning, there were a number of helpful questions and then one person in the group prayed for me, which I appreciated.

Later Friday night, we went out with a friend who had been in the group and were doing a bit of a debrief with her–she wanted our honest feedback and we gave it–hopefully in a loving way.  Well, it seemed fair enough for me to ask her about feedback from my timeline presentation.  She had asked me at the time if I ever wondered if it was enough, if life was unfair–if I had gone through more than enough of my share of crises, trauma etc.   After replying something about an opportunity to experience the sufficient grace of God, she asked another question.  “I wonder if God is trying to teach you something that you have not yet learned,” said our friend.  I didn’t react in anger although I did say that was a question that I try not to ask and don’t find particularly helpful to even ask.  A better question I suggested might be, “where do I see God at work in the situation?” “How am I experiencing God in the midst of the present circumstances?” etc.

I think those are the better questions to be asking but I won’t deny that I could be quite stubborn and hard headed and it is taking a lot of divine attention to move me to the place God wants me to be.  I truly am trying to be a better listener but old habits die hard!

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