After a long time away from reading Parchment and Pen, I just read the top ten reasons the dispensationalists did not cross the road. IMHO, here are the best ones.
9. They thought that the other side was for Israel and this side was for the church.
7. It is pointless since Jesus is just going to bring them back after 7 years.
6. Like the OT prophets and the church age, they were unable to see the other side.
5. They counted and it would take 18 steps. That divided by 3 is 6. 666. Therefore, crossing the road would be taking the mark of the beast.
3. Dallas Theological Seminary has yet published anything telling us how to do it.
1. They thought we would be raptured before we got there anyway.
Lest anyone think that they are picking on dispensationalists (of which I am one), they also have posts on why did the reformed theologian not . . . 11. A woman already crossed. We don’t follow women.
why did the evangelical not . . . 5. On the other side of the road there was a guy who was the friend of a friend of a friend who voted for Obama.
why did the arminian not 11. He is the one who is in charge. No one is going to make him do anything. 10. We are not sure if he will cross or not. No one knows. Not even God.
and why did the emerger not cross the road. 7. Because only arrogant people cross roads.
Click on these links to read the entire posts. Be sure to laugh at yourself when you find your theological position! In looking for a chicken picture, I found posts here and here which provide various answers to the classic question
If you are a dog lover, you gotta love this. Saturday morning here and I guess I have some time to look around the blog universe. Need to laugh? Check out the Things You CAN’T Do If You are not a Dog. A bit crude for some of you but even my wife laughed when she came in and heard me listening!
Tongue in cheek reflections on the birth of Jesus, why we unwrap Christmas presents and why Santa Claus is so adored, from Malcolm Gladwell at Vanity Fair.
After looking at these clippings, I could not stop laughing. Here are some samples
Amusing video from dailymotion. Sure feels like this is happening.
Maybe you missed this as I did?
With the government on the brink of rescuing the U.S. auto industry, we have learned that the Treasury Department is drawing up plans to bail out Christmas. “We have reason to believe,” said a person close to the matter, “that without an immediate capital injection, Santa Claus will fail before December 24.” Mr. Claus could not be reached for comment.
Government officials are said to be concerned at the risk that the collapse of Santa Claus could pose to the nation’s intricately related system of holiday happiness. Though a failure by Santa Claus poses the largest systemic risk, the government is also prepared to step in to bail out Christmas trees, caroling parties and mistletoe producers.
There will be no Nativity Scene in D.C. this year.
The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a Nativity Scene in Washington D.C. this Christmas season. This isn’t for any religious reason – they simply have not been able to find Three Wise Men in the Nation’s capital.
(from Jeff Brown)
A Frenchman, a Brit, and a Russian are admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. The Frenchman says, “they must be French, they’re naked and they’re eating fruit.” The Englishman says, “clearly they’re English. Observe how politely the man is offering the woman the fruit.” The Russian notes, “they are Russian of course. They have nothing to wear, nothing to eat, and they think they are in paradise.”