Reflectons on aging

Following the death of one of the monks, Merton reflects on aging and memories of his youth.  From A Year with Thomas Merton

If I were wiser, I would not mind, but I am not so sure I am wiser.  I have been through more, I have endured a lot of things, perhaps fruitlessly.  I do not entirely think that–but it is possible.  What shakes me is that–I wish I were that rugby player, vain, vigorous, etc., and could start over again!  And yet how absurd.  What would I ever do?

Seems like I had a conversation about this earlier in the week.  People sometimes assume a level of expertise or maturity or wisdom of us when we get older that may not be necessarily true.  Lord, let me embrace both who I am and who I am not and be content with that.

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